iType a lot

Winter break

So apparently I have so bad of an OCD that i have almost half of my winter break already planned out. It’s a habit of mine I guess since I’m so use to going by a schedule. Everyone has been telling me to relax and I’m thinking too much. There’s a lot to think about. This week I had to deal with four guys, three parties, and two student council things. On top of that, school stuff. My feelings have been jumping all throughout the week and it’s been driving me crazy. But hopefully, Ill be bale to get thru the holidays. Ima try to relax and have fun

PS im on an iPad :D

Late Night Thoughts.

My Saterday was terrible. Even though it would be a really chill day, i was cranky the whole day. Lots of thoughts have been going through my head and last night i came to a random realization. People’s actions can be very misleading. 

Me and my friend were talking about “How to tell if a person likes you” and i came to the conclusion that you really never can tell. All the stuff included like “if they talk to you a lot, you start having late night conversations, and if they say really sweet things about you, if they joke around with you a lot” etc. To be honest though, I tend to do that often no matter who the person is; just trying to be a nice person and a cool friend. And now i feel bad. 

I came to thinking that because i do this, guys start to like me and think that i like them; then in reality, i would only see them as a friend. Which got me thinking, this situation happens commonly. Sometimes intensionally but also accidentally. SO NOW, im kind of confused. I guess all you gotta do is “go with your gut. you only live once in this world”. 

Simplicity in the world, sadly, does not exist.

GOODNESS GRACIOUS

So today before I went home, I caught myself in a situation where I had to explain the definition of an orgasm to a friend. At first, I was going to leave it be and tell her that it’s best to keep your mind clean; but then she insisted that she can’t be naive about this kind of stuff. SOOOOO i told her. She freaked out. It was weird though because its sort of normal. It’s a fact in the world. She could’ve heard worse stuff. There are worse stuff out there. But should she be shielded of every single terrible thing out there? Are things truly better left unsaid? Maybe…

some people think we have the right to know everything there is to know. But if we were given the chance to learn it all, could we handle it?? If we were to know everything there is in the universe, would we go insane?

I myself would rather not. If we did know everything, where would the wonder be? The wonder that powers creativity and imagination; we wouldn’t need it because we would already know everything. The wonder lies in the mystery of the unknown.

Vacation :]

Everyone needs one every once in a while. Ive been soo busy I’ve forgotten how to relax. Even on the long weekends im fortunate to have, i haven’t gotten the time to actually enjoy it. Today was different though. I did two things that i would have NEVER done:

1. Go bowling WITHOUT bumpers (got second out of three people :D)

2. Have dinner at my house with 3 guys. 

My dad was very upset about the second one because of that normal protectiveness over me but it turned out to be really nice. It was the kind of day I needed and the kind of day that every hard worker should have every once in a while. 

Thank you to those who helped me remember how to relax and take it easy.

Homecoming Week

This week was the most busiest,tiring, epic week ever. I have been running around, turning in late work, been emotionally stressed and crazy, 

I LOVED IT

My team won: HALLWAY DECORATIONS, SPIRIT WEEK, POWDER PUFF FOOTBALL GAME, AND the football team won the HOMECOMING GAME! Marching band was FANTASTIC 

…The dance was fun. EPIC WEEK!

sad thing is, now that all the chaos is over, the week slides in to uneventfulness. I’m bored already.  

Mothers and Daughters

Mothers are always happy to have daughters and usually those who don’t have a daughter usually wish to have one at times. They always talk about dressing them up and putting on make up when they don’t know how. Talking about “girl problems” etc.

The irony is, growing up, I never liked having my mom dress me up in dresses and skirts and putting makeup on me because i just felt plain old stupid. Even now do i find it difficult to tell her school issues and ‘boy problems’. It just doesn’t click in my head. It seems like she doesn’t understand my way of thinking.

However, the reality is, 90% of the time, she does know what i’m talking about. I just don’t feel comfortable talking to her about stuff. I feel happy for those who tell their mother everything. The restrictions that my parents give me may tie in with me not telling them anything. I’m getting better at it though. They know a little more than they did back in 7th grade

2012 freakout

Thanks to that whole “Mayan Calander” deal and the Aztecs of having the reputation of “predicting the future”, the world has had the freak out about 2012. Myself, I didn’t believe it for a second. Just another excuse to create a movie and get everyone all crazed up. People thought that the end of the world would be in the year 2000 but here we are a decade later still breathing.

Today before I left school, my teacher informs me: “The end of the world has been postponed. Apparently the guy has miscalculated and the death of our planet will actually end 50 years from 2012”

I personally think that the end of the world is not meant to be known down to the specific date. We humans just don’t have the right to know when. It can happen tomorrow, it can happen next week, it can happen 20 years from now, it wouldn’t matter. It most likely would be the time when we’d LEAST expect it. But for the time being, we shouldn’t spend all of our time worrying about it. If we do, tim will pass us like a bullet. Live life while you still have it,…but dont live it up where you’ll lose it too early. ;P

Marching Band

Today has got to be the first time ever that i’ve cried at school over band. One thing that stays as a fact about marching band, we have no self confidence. It’s either that or TOO MUCH self confidence that it’s cocky. Marching band is one of the most craziest band actvities to be in. It can be AWSUM if the band as a whole works at it.

HOWEVER

My band is known for its slackers. Those who dont really give a damn but show up anyway to take some of the glory when there’s a shining moment. Those who mess around even tho there are times to be COPLETELY focused. They think it’s no big deal because we suck anyway. They try to find the easy way out. Any reason to leave because they know that as a whole, we’re jst not that good.

Today was different. Today, my band played just BEAUTIFULLY in our last drill. 100x better than those that we think are better than us. The sound was simply amazing. BUT do to the LACK of focus, the LACK of determination, the LACK of seriousness, we can’t show everyone else what we got. We cannot prove to anyon that we got what it takes. MOST IMPORTANTLY, we can’t prove to OURSELVES that we got what it takes. No lesson can be learned. No pride can be gained. All because WE as a BAND couldnt keep it together and strive for excellence.

I hope everyone’s happy now.